Original:
Cohen and Boyer’s attempt at
genetic cloning began with modifying a bacterium known as E. coli. Their goal
was to change the nature of this bacterium. If they manipulated its genes,
(i.e. nature) they would have just proven that genetic engineering (whether it
be cloning or manipulation) was possible. After the scientists found that
inserting genes in to a bacterium was possible (via an enzyme), they proved the
possibility of genetic cloning in 1973.
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| Henderick, Amaury. "Words" 05/13/2007 via flickr Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 2.0 Generic |
Rewritten
Excerpt:
Cohen and Boyer’s first attempt at
genetic cloning was modifying E. coli. If they were able to change the nature
of the bacterium through gene manipulation, they would prove that genetic
engineering was possible. Cohen and Boyer saw that inserting genes into E. coli
was indeed possible by use of enzymes, thereby proving the possibility of
cloning in 1973.
The rewritten paragraph eliminates the
extra phrases in parentheses from the original excerpt which makes the
paragraph more concise. By combining some sentences, the paragraph flows better
from idea to idea while still maintaining the chronology of events and giving
enough detail about the events.
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