Local Revision: Passive and Active Voice

Active (Specific)                                 Active (General)                                  Passive

Manipulated                                        Made                                                   Was Promoted by

Injects                                                  Discovered                                         

Bind                                                    Put

Fight                                                    Began

Regenerate                                           Was

Encounter                                            Change

Attack                                                  Prove

Copy                                                   Found

Destroy                                               Became

Program                                              Failed

Repair                                                  Believed

Inserted                                               Modify

                                                            Promoted

                                                            Formed

                                                            Transformed

                                                            Is

                                                            Seem

                                                            Allows

                                                            Implies

                                                            Want

                                                            Said

                                                            Try

                                                            Contains

                                                            Fit

                                                            Produce

                                                            Understand

                                                            Cure

                                                            Develop

                                                            Treated

                                                            Used

                                                            Cut

 

Roome, Peter. "painting oregon" 05/31/2014 via flick
Attribution-NonCommercial 2.0 Generic

1.  The majority of my verbs used were general, vague, and non-specific. There are some instances of specific verbs and only one instance of passive voice. Overall, active voice is maintained, but I need to edit my verbs to show a picture rather than merely tell.

2. The use of verbs in my piece could be improved to be more precise and paint a vivid picture. As a majority of the piece talks about the genetic technology, the audience should be able to visualize the process exactly as the scientists who are performing the experiment. This would be possible by choosing specific verbs. I think this would also engage the audience more, rather than boring them with scientific procedures.